Espionage

I'm finishing up transcribing my recent chat with late-discovery adoptee Jenni Dyman, and in the meantime have noted an interesting parallel in the news- the recently discovered Russian spies/agents.

News articles report that some of the Russian spies living as couples have children together. So, depending on the age/cognitive level of the children, it would seem that the kids could be having a "late-discovery adoption experience" of sorts: the identities of their parents are false, or lies, or "adopted." The children must be asking the question, "Who does that make me?"

The scenario brings up questions I've always had regarding the occupations that require secrecy (and have the oaths to back it up). I'm acquainted with a few people who have jobs that "they could tell you about, but then they'd have to kill you". The very nature of their jobs holds me back from asking them, on a personal level, what makes them want to, or be willing to, function in an arena of secrecy.

Working for a good cause could naturally be a factor. I also wonder whether some people get a sense of power over others by possessing secrets? I wonder what it's like to lie down in bed at night with a spouse knowing that his/her workday- a huge portion of her/his life- is locked away in a box that can't be visited.

In the "adoption healing" circle we generally consider secrets to be toxic. In my personal life, I feel like no experience is real or at its fullest, no problem is truly "navigable," until it is shared. This isn't to say carte-blanch that Secrets are Bad. And my reality isn't everybody's and doesn't need to be. But my reality leaves me very curious as to how spies "tick".

Does anyone have thoughts/insights?